Have you ever felt led by God to do something? If not then this post might not have much value to you but if you have then let me ask another question. How did you know that God was leading? Was it circumstance, a big bright light, a still small voice, or just your heart? Usually Gods’ leading is really confusing. In fact… it’s always confusing and the biggest problem with it is that it’s not always what you want. But it’s always what He wants.
God and I don’t always agree with each other… it’s shocking, I know. It’s also pretty dumb if you think about it but I bet if you’re honest with yourself you’ll see it too. And how I wish, oh how I wish, that God wanted what I wanted. And, don’t get me wrong, sometimes our hearts and God’s heart just collide in agreement and it’s beautiful but sometimes it’s just more complicated.
So what do we do? Do we try to conform God to us or us to God? Now if we call God Lord and we truly believe He is God then the answer is obvious; we must go through the grueling and painful process of conforming our will to God’s will (of course this means going through the equally grueling process of finding God’s will… topic for another post). This means dealing with our problems instead of ignoring them. It means stopping long enough to discern.
In my life I can see where God has placed me and where He wants me but my heart wants to be somewhere else. Many of the people who are closet to me are in one place but my life is somewhere else and God has done so much to put it there. Now I have the confusion of wanting one thing but knowing that what God wants it different. So this is a very important time. When you come to a place like this there are two directions you can go. You can either fight God or follow God and trust that what He has in mind is better than what you have in mind. There’s no how-to book or instruction manual there’s just you and God and community. I add community because if you’re ever doing it alone then God isn’t there. God is in community. This means you have to open yourself to community, sometimes even ask for help and that can be the hardest part.
As difficult as it all may be, and it is difficult, God is there. He calls for your trust and obedience. His will is confusing and even painful but it’s always good. The pain of the cross is the symbol of new life; this is the paradox of God’s love.